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RAWR!
music: Bob Sinclar - Love Generation (Featuring Gary Pine)
mood: Happy/Tired
EVERYONE SHOULD GET FACEBOOK, end of story.
Keenan whispered on 05.14.07
@ 01:35 PM PST [5 shattered pieces]
What I Need To Hear
music: Happy Feet - Boogie Wonderland
mood: Little Irritated
This is what I want someone that loves me to say to me, something along these lines, its just nice to be told no matter what that they will be there for me, through darkness or light, better or worse, they won't back down... Too much to ask?
"I’ll follow you
No matter how bitter it is, even within the darkness of the world
Surely, you’re shining
I’ll overcome the limit of the future
So that my soul won’t be destroyed due to my weaknesses
my ways will overlap
Now, God bless us two…
I’m ready
Even in a dark future
I’ll become strong and my destiny just might be changeable
Even though I want to fulfill my wish
God knows everything…"
Keenan whispered on 04.28.07
@ 12:41 AM PST [3 shattered pieces]
EEEKK!
music: Rick Astley - Never Going to Give You Up
mood: Tired Kinda?
Well I have probably my second hardest test tomorrow that I have ever had. Organic Chemistry. EW! What the hell is up with that? To tell you the truth I actually enjoy doing it now for some strange reason, making things from my knowledge and there is more than one way to do it, some not so right, makes it so much more fun! I'm actually suprised at myself for thinking that. I like chemistry! Maybe I will take more! Who knows, I think I will be re-doing Organic Chem next year, I want a better mark in it.
Keenan whispered on 04.24.07
@ 03:15 AM PST [No Love]
Guitar Hero must save the world
music: Iron Maiden - The Trooper
mood: Interested
First off, I fucking LOVE THIS SONG! I played it on Guitar Hero 2 the other night and even though I suck at the game, I still had fun, I actually didn't mind losing.
Second, someone post a comment without a name, but since he/she used pretty I think I'm going to assume Kazha since it was her and Kevin that really only knew about the other blog to begin with. SO HELLO! Haven't talked to you in a while. Heard your moving in with Adrian soon, pretty exciting eh?
Nothing too exciting is happening in my life. One more final to go and I'm done another year of school. And you know what? I still have no fucking clue what I want to do with myself. Though if I got into the nursing program, I would be really happy.
Rough relationship times, broke up, somewhat together, don't know what I really want. A little sad/heart broken at the same time. Not getting into the jist of it, but were still talking and hanging out. Le sigh... Thas it so far.
Keenan whispered on 04.22.07
@ 08:39 PM PST [4 shattered pieces]
Life is life
music: Anastasia - At The Beginning
mood: Optimistic
Life is what makes us who we are, without these feelings, emotions, sadness, happiness we would have no idea who and what we are as an individual. These scars, these reminders tell us not what to do, to never do it again, and try something new. Life is life, an experience of a life time that you only get to experience once. So take it one day at a time, don’t worry about the future, just do what makes you happy at the time. You may frown upon it later, but then you don’t always have to like your choices, its just what you wanted to do at a time.
Just walk down that road, and never look back, keep your head up and forward and face every day with a smile. Never frown, though days may kick you down, people may kick you down, there are those out there that care and are smiling for you. Keep everything you seen, learned, heard, experienced and use it as a weapon, a tool to the future.
Keenan whispered on 03.22.07
@ 04:13 PM PST [2 shattered pieces]
A little to someone...
music: Rie Fu - I Wanna Go To A Place...
mood: Tired of existence...
"How dan dan! How are you, I'm sitting here going through all my old folders on my harddrive. We have really know each other for a long time eh? Since grade 9 to be exact (or atleast thats how far back my records go) and I've found some of the first layouts I ever made, and for some strange reason they have your name on them. Do you remember them? I do! AHAHA so long ago to me, yet it really isn't. I was going through everything, I found saved threads from AF, msn conversations with everyone. Kind of made me sad that I don't keep in touch with anyone anymore, not even you! Sitting here I remember when I made that "Stumbing In" icon for AF listening to Great Big Sea, and you telling me you never heard them before. So I sent you their music. I wonder if you still have them. BLAH! Who knows. It was so long ago. I remember when you had dannik.tk, and you had music playing, so I had to copy you and have music. I found all these old blog layouts. Even one from /Makoto on your server. I found an old DN Angel one I made for you, and old FF8, Naruto. And you know what they all had in common with each other, but not with yours? Mine were shitty and yours were good. I think you were just humoring me by telling me they were good! Ahahaha, man the good old days, just early teens, not knowing whats going to happen, not caring where we are going to be. Those days. Kinda makes you think doesn't it. I found some weird stuff, some cool stuff, stuff that pisses me off. No wonder I was never able to delete this stuff, its my memories of all my AF friends. Sorry I'm blabbing, I hope you don't mind, I don't think you will! I hope not :p Ah Great Big Sea, remember who I always made you listen to it :p Sorry I was so pushy and so HYPER then. I've kind of mellowed a little, but I hope I'm still the same funny guy. I just found how cynical I got after Kazha broke up with me. You were there for me! Thank you! My lifes kind of taken and turn, lots of drops, pick ups, stabs to the heart, but I'm still hanging in. I wonder how you are doing? Maybe you will respond to this. It doesn't really matter. I just really need someone to talk to ya know, I don't talk about whats wrong with me, whats making me up set, whats made my day, whats my new addiction. You were always there with that, thank you btw! So maybe we can't get on at the same time on msn to talk to one another, we are simply RETARDED, cause you can still email! I'm really retarded. Going through all this stuff has made me cry. I'm such a baby. Fuck sakes, sorry :p Wow I really typed a lot. You probably won't even read this, which is fine! No worries if you don't. I just started reflecting a lot. I've gotten a lot stronger over the years, different, changed, good, for worse who knows right?
Its good to see VD open again. You know I would have gladly taken over if I wasn't so busy with life, which kind of sucks you know. Life kind of has a way of kicking me down. I found this one txt file you sent me back in the day that says you didn't know your place in the world, that people are there for you, and you have no idea. Well I've gotten to that point now. Sorry I just need someone, or something to unload everything on my chest, its built up for so long... Hope you don't mind. You can always close it and I can pretend you read it. BAH! Anyway, I'm just no longer happy with who I have turned out to be. Like I went wrong and one mistake just changes my who being forever. I just wish this pain would go away, wish I could be whole again, but I know it won't, not as long as I'm stuck in this city. I just wish to start somewhere where no one will ask about my past, who only knows the old me, who won't push about the little stuff and just like me for the me they know and not the me that I know. It would make me feel so much better. I feel dead inside. Some days I don't, some days I do, some are inbetween. I can only distract myself for so long. I just keep questioning my character when I was so sure of what it was, it just changes, I want it to go back... I just know it never will.
Anyway, I hope to hear from you!"
Keenan whispered on 03.20.07
@ 12:58 AM PST [4 shattered pieces]
Is it true?
music: Jewel - Standing Still
mood: Not So Happy
Is it true what they say "Its better to have loved and lost than to never have loved before?" Many people will argue the yes, but then there are those that argue the no. But the answer itself lies within thy self. No one can tell you what to feel, its up to you.
For my, I've done more "lost" than "love" and I must say I prefer to say that this saying is quite false. Love does feel wonderful when you're in it, but afterwards, the pain, heartache, tears, hatred, the sense of loneliness, or anything else you could possibly feel is unbearable. Love hurts, it destroys many hearts in a year. This feeling of loneliness, and heartache would never be there in the first place if you never loved at all. You would be fine with yourself. You may long for another, but that feeling will pass at time.
Friends, family is where its at. Without those, who are you really? Family makes you who you are even if family hasn't been the nicest thing to you. You wouldn't be you without it. Sure outside influences help, but its family that matters the most.
If you find that endless love, keep it and hopefully you will never have to feel this pain. But if you don't, you know what I'm trying to get at.
Keenan whispered on 02.05.07
@ 09:09 PM PST [No Love]
Life... Or Something Like It
music: Gundam SEED - Shinjirareba Koso
mood: Neutral/Slightly sad side
Life, existence, it all has different meaning to people. Some live to see another day, fight another fight. Some live for the future, some live for grades, metals, honor, money, and some live to find that certain someone.
When they find that certain someone, it all changes. It you may ask? It in general, the sense, everything around you, your life, dreams, hopes, tears, ambitions and love, it all changes. You no longer dream of who you may find or what he/she will look like, but you know how you want them to think, feel and love. You want them to understand you, you want them to laugh at things that may seem hurtful to others, or even cry for you in time of sadness. You remain the same, but your whole though process changes, the thought of them makes you smile, their tears make you cry. You are, in a sense, connected to them, not just physically, emotionally, or even mentally.
This connection is much deeper, different and very hard to break. When you aren't with them you can feel their sadness, you almost know what they are thinking. This connect is called Love. Love can stretch through time, existence, matter, and death. This love is different than anything anyone has ever felt.
Love in a sense can be betrayed, broken. But if you, if he/she really loves you, you can fight through it. Keep going. Love is about forgiveness, no matter how bad it is, if they love you and if you TRULY love them you can fight through anything. Its an endless bond that even if separated will never go away....
Keenan whispered on 02.05.07
@ 05:29 PM PST [No Love]
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Organized Chaos: Rainbow of False Love © Keenan
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